The story · selected entries, real changes

Still becoming
myself.

This is a personal history with the awkward bits left in. A few old posts, the dreams that became actual days, and the questions that kept changing.

Dates show when entries were posted or recorded in the collection. A photograph, memory, or story can be older than its entry.

2018—1901

“Did you like recent yet?”

That was an actual Story in 2018. In the next year’s collection, another photo asks people to like and comment. It is easy to laugh at the wording now. It is also part of the record: I wanted people to see what I was putting out. These little posts belong in the story, too.

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A 2018 Story asking whether people had liked the recent post.

2020—2102

Somewhere to go. Something to wear.

The selected images from these years are fragments: water, a mirror, an outfit, shoes under street light, a red car in a garage. They do not come with a neat explanation. I like that they show the ordinary process of figuring out how I wanted to move through the world.

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A waterside photograph from the 2020 collection.

2022—2303

Please don’t make me too serious.

There are photos of flips, costumes, friends, and a very committed pose for absolutely no good reason. I want the ambitious parts of my life here, but I want these parts here just as much. A tidy biography would lose quite a lot of the person.

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Two people photographed mid-flip on a green lawn.

OCT 202404

Before leaving.

I asked a friend to take a few photographs before leaving. The caption does not sound like a person who had every piece worked out. It sounds like someone who wanted to go and was also thinking about everything that would stay behind. That tension is the interesting part.

I thought about leaving my family, friends and my animals behind. I thought about how the fuck all of this would work.

Original entry · 2024-10-23

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Alex outside a Chicago building, in a black vest and gray trousers.

WINTER 2024—2505

Then the dream had people in it.

The photographs fill up with lifts, bright snow, pink skies, boards, and people. In January I wrote that almost three months had passed and it still felt like I had just arrived. By April, leaving hurt. The mountain chapter was more than the idea of a mountain chapter.

It’s already been almost 3 months of chasing my dreams and it feels like I just arrived.

Original entry · 2025-01-10

Lowkey leaving really sucked, gonna miss the homies but yk how it goes. Reunion will b soon, no doubt.

Original April 17, 2025 post caption

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A group walking through deep snow at night.

LATER 202506

A life doesn’t stay in one lane.

Back in the collection are courts, dogs, food, people, and everyday attempts to make a day feel good. There are experiments and opinions in the original posts. There is also an ordinary person who does not do everything perfectly. I want to keep that distinction visible.

Whether that would be mma, HIIT workouts, bike ride, calisthenics, walks and a lot of them, etc.

Original entry · 2025-09-03

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A bright blue outdoor court and an afternoon outside.

202607

“Im the niche.”

In April, I posted three thoughts about the difficulty of staying in one niche. I wanted to record more, and I worried about missing the moment. I felt I had a lot to share, and I still did not know how to package all of it. That is a more useful place to begin this website than pretending the whole thing was already resolved.

Im the niche. Im the blueprint. But im having so much trouble figuring out how the fuck I can display myself in an entertaining way that isn’t niche specific Im drinking a brown sugar oatmilk shaken espresso with whole milk if you’re curious I just need to come up with a way to package it all into consistent videos But I feel as if I have so much life experience, knowledge, and wisdom to share

Original entry · 2026-04-06

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